What if the traits you've spent years trying to fix are not necessarily holding you back?
What if some of the things you consider weaknesses are actually connected to the qualities that make you uniquely valuable?
For entrepreneurs, executives, and professionals, personal development can easily become an endless pursuit of becoming "better." We compare ourselves to other leaders, identify our weaknesses, work on our shortcomings, and try to become the person we think we are supposed to be.
But according to leadership strategist, executive coach, speaker, and author Jeni Yelton, there is another way to think about growth.
You're not broken.
You aren't perfect either. None of us are.
The goal isn't to eliminate every flaw. It's to understand yourself, recognize what makes you uniquely valuable, manage the characteristics that can get in your way, and use your natural gifts to create meaningful impact.
That is the central idea behind Yelton's book, Confidently Flawed: The Fatal Flaw Theory to Stop Fixing and Start Thriving, and the focus of her conversation with Joe Abreu on the Glovisor Podcast.
The Problem With Constantly Trying to Fix Yourself
Personal development is valuable. Learning, improving, developing new skills, and challenging yourself can all lead to growth.
But there is a difference between growing because you want to become more capable and growing because you believe there is something fundamentally wrong with you.
That distinction matters.
Yelton has spent more than 25 years studying adult learning, leadership, training, development, and organizational behavior. Throughout her career, she noticed how often individuals and organizations fall into the comparison trap.
Companies create expectations for how employees should behave. Employees compare themselves against those expectations. Leaders identify gaps and try to correct them.
The problem is that people are not interchangeable parts.
A characteristic that looks like a weakness in one situation may be an advantage in another.
A person who is highly analytical may be perceived as slow to act in one environment but may bring valuable thoughtfulness to complex decisions.
Someone who is highly adaptable may appear inconsistent to one person while being exceptionally resilient in an environment where circumstances constantly change.
Someone who is naturally independent may struggle with certain team dynamics while also possessing the initiative needed to create something new.
The question isn't simply, "How do I get rid of this?"
A better question may be:
"How do I understand this characteristic well enough to manage it and use it effectively?"
You're Not Broken—But You Still Have Work to Do
Jeni's message isn't that people shouldn't improve.
Quite the opposite.
She makes an important distinction between growth and self-rejection.
You can acknowledge a flaw without defining yourself by it.
You can work on a weakness without believing that you are defective.
You can develop new skills without trying to become somebody else.
In her words, people should stop beating themselves up trying to become something they're not meant to be.
That doesn't mean ignoring problems. It means changing the purpose behind personal development.
Instead of asking, "How do I fix myself?"
Ask:
"How can I become more effective with who I already am?"
That shift can change how entrepreneurs approach leadership, relationships, career decisions, and even business growth.
Why Organizations Keep Trying to Fix Their Employees
The same concept applies to organizations.
Companies frequently identify performance gaps and respond by creating training programs, changing processes, introducing new technology, or revising procedures.
Those things can be useful.
But Jeni argues that organizations can miss one of the most important elements of transformation: the employee.
When organizations implement change, they often focus heavily on the process, technology, systems, and standard operating procedures. Employees may receive training on the new process, but training alone doesn't guarantee that people will adopt it.
People have to want the change.
They have to understand why the change matters.
They need to see how the change affects them.
And they need to be motivated to implement what they have learned.
Jeni describes this as one of the biggest failures she sees in organizational change. Organizations can invest heavily in new systems while overlooking the human side of transformation.
The result can be an expensive new system that employees don't fully adopt.
The problem may not be the system.
It may be the lack of employee engagement with the change.
Training Doesn't Automatically Create Transformation
Imagine an employee whose performance review says they need to improve their time management.
They are sent to a time-management workshop.
The workshop is engaging. They learn new techniques. They leave with tools and strategies.
Then they return to their desk and nothing changes.
The manager becomes frustrated.
The employee becomes frustrated.
Everyone wonders why the training didn't work.
Jeni's explanation is that knowledge and motivation are not the same thing.
A person can know exactly what they should do and still not do it.
If the employee isn't motivated to change, another training session may not solve the problem.
This is why effective development needs to go beyond simply transferring knowledge.
The real question is:
What will cause the person to adopt the behavior?
What makes the change meaningful to them?
What benefit do they see?
What is getting in their way?
And how can the organization create an environment where the desired behavior is more likely to succeed?
That is the difference between training and transformation.
The Three Levels of Purpose
One of the most compelling concepts Jeni shares is her framework for understanding purpose through three levels.
The first level is what you do.
This includes your job, tasks, responsibilities, compensation, schedule, and day-to-day activities.
It's the tangible part of your work.
The second level is connection.
This includes the people around you, your relationships, your community, and the culture you experience.
For an employee, it can mean having colleagues they enjoy working with and feeling accepted within the organization.
For an entrepreneur, it can involve the people you serve, the network you build, and the relationships that surround your business.
Both of these levels matter.
But Jeni believes many people stop there.
The third level goes beyond yourself.
It asks deeper questions.
What are your gifts?
What do you value?
What motivates you?
Who are you meant to serve?
What impact do you want to make?
What do you want your work to mean?
This third level is internally driven. It is about knowing that what you're doing has meaning beyond immediate compensation, job title, or workplace conditions.
Why Purpose Can Make You More Resilient
Consider what happens when your sense of fulfillment depends entirely on external circumstances.
You love your job because you have great coworkers.
Then your best friend leaves.
Suddenly, the culture feels different.
Or a new leader arrives and changes the environment.
Or the organization restructures.
If your entire sense of purpose is tied to those external conditions, your satisfaction can change dramatically.
But when your work is connected to something deeper—your values, gifts, purpose, and desired impact—external changes may still affect you, but they don't necessarily define your entire experience.
That's why Jeni starts with the third level when working with individuals and organizations.
Rather than beginning with, "What job should you have?" or "How much money do you want to make?" she encourages people to explore who they are, what they value, what they are naturally good at, and who they want to serve.
Those answers can then inform the practical decisions that follow.
What should you do?
What should you offer?
Who should you work with?
How should you build relationships?
What should you charge?
What type of organization should you create?
Purpose becomes the foundation for the decisions rather than an afterthought.
Discovering the Gifts You May Be Undervaluing
One of the most interesting parts of the conversation is Jeni's observation that people often undervalue their natural gifts precisely because those gifts come easily to them.
If something feels easy, we may assume it isn't valuable.
That can be a major blind spot.
Jeni shares a personal example involving her creativity and craftsmanship. At Renaissance festivals, she would see things she believed she could make herself and therefore wouldn't buy them.
The irony?
She often never actually made them.
Her ability to imagine how something could be created made her undervalue the skill because it seemed easy to her.
That realization illustrates an important principle:
What comes naturally to you may be valuable precisely because it comes naturally to you.
Entrepreneurs frequently make this mistake.
They assume everyone can do what they do.
They dismiss their ability to explain complicated ideas because "it's easy."
They undervalue their ability to connect with people because "I just talk to people."
They overlook their ability to organize because "someone has to do it."
They don't recognize their creativity because "I've always been this way."
But your natural abilities may be clues to your greatest strengths.
A Simple Exercise for Finding Your Natural Gifts
Jeni offers a straightforward starting point for identifying your gifts.
Think about the things people have always known you for.
What do people consistently come to you for?
What seems easy to you but difficult for others?
What abilities have people complimented you on repeatedly?
What do you naturally do without being asked?
What problems do you seem to solve instinctively?
What do people say you're good at that you tend to dismiss?
These questions can reveal patterns.
You can also use formal assessment tools and frameworks to explore strengths and personality characteristics, but self-reflection can be a powerful place to begin.
The key is to stop automatically dismissing what comes naturally.
Your ease with something may be evidence of capability—not evidence that the skill has no value.
Your Strength Can Also Become a Flaw
There is an important nuance to Jeni's philosophy.
A gift isn't automatically beneficial in every situation.
The same characteristic that helps you in one environment can create problems in another.
Jeni uses her own flexibility as an example. Being highly adaptable can be a strength because it allows her to respond to change without becoming overwhelmed.
But in another environment, that same flexibility could potentially be interpreted differently.
That's why self-awareness matters.
The goal isn't to label every characteristic as either good or bad.
It's to understand the characteristic well enough to know when it helps and when it gets in the way.
This is where the concept of a "fatal flaw" becomes particularly useful.
The Fatal Flaw Question: Is It Actually Fatal?
Jeni's approach doesn't suggest ignoring weaknesses.
Instead, she asks a more useful question:
Is the flaw actually fatal?
Is it damaging your career?
Your organization?
Your health?
Your relationships?
If it truly creates serious consequences, the objective isn't necessarily to "fix" your personality.
The objective may be to manage the characteristic effectively.
That is a subtle but powerful distinction.
You don't have to transform yourself into another person.
You need enough awareness to prevent your weaknesses from controlling the outcomes that matter.
At the same time, you can continue developing the qualities that create the greatest positive impact.
Leadership Doesn't Always Mean Becoming a Manager
One of Jeni's coaching stories illustrates how this philosophy can completely change someone's understanding of career success.
She worked with a professional who repeatedly applied for new positions and leadership opportunities but continued to be turned down.
She knew she wasn't happy where she was.
She knew she had more to contribute.
But she hadn't yet identified what she actually wanted to do or why.
Through coaching, they explored her gifts, skills, purpose, fulfillment, and the impact she wanted to make.
Eventually, she discovered something important.
She wanted to lead.
But she didn't necessarily need to become a traditional manager.
Her path was leadership through influence.
That distinction changed the way she approached her career. Instead of pursuing a title simply because it represented advancement, she began making career decisions based on her strengths, purpose, and desired impact.
Over time, she moved forward with greater confidence and clarity.
The lesson is significant for anyone who equates leadership with management.
You can lead without managing people.
You can influence without having authority.
You can create change without sitting at the top of an organizational chart.
Leadership can be expressed through expertise, relationships, communication, creativity, mentoring, problem-solving, and influence.
The right path isn't necessarily the most obvious path.
ADKAR: Making Organizational Change Measurable
When Jeni works with organizations on change and transformation, she uses the ADKAR framework as a structure for helping people move through change.
The framework addresses awareness, desire, knowledge, ability, and reinforcement.
The sequence matters because organizations cannot assume that giving someone information will automatically create behavior change.
People need to understand why the change is necessary.
They need a reason to want it.
They need the knowledge to implement it.
They need the ability to put it into practice.
And the change needs to be reinforced so that it continues.
This approach connects directly with Jeni's larger philosophy: successful transformation is not just about implementing a process.
It is about helping people adopt it.
That means leaders need to pay attention not only to what is changing but also to how people experience the change.
From Employee Development to Organizational Culture
Jeni's philosophy ultimately expands beyond individual coaching.
Organizations also need to examine the culture they are creating.
If leadership tells employees they should behave a certain way but senior leaders don't model those behaviors, the culture becomes inconsistent.
If a company talks about purpose but employees can't see how that purpose affects decisions, the message loses credibility.
If an organization says it values professional development but treats development as an expendable expense, employees receive another message.
Culture isn't simply what appears in a handbook.
It is what people experience.
That means leaders at every level influence the culture, whether they realize it or not.
Senior leaders, in particular, have an outsized responsibility because their behavior can shape what people throughout the organization believe is acceptable, important, and rewarded.
Confidence Doesn't Require Perfection
The deeper message behind Confidently Flawed is not that flaws don't matter.
It's that perfection isn't a prerequisite for confidence.
You can know what you're good at.
You can know where you struggle.
You can recognize your limitations.
You can continue learning.
You can make mistakes.
And you can still lead.
For entrepreneurs, this can be especially important.
Building a business exposes weaknesses quickly. You may discover that you're not naturally good at sales, delegation, operations, financial management, hiring, marketing, or public speaking.
The answer isn't necessarily to become excellent at everything.
Sometimes the better answer is to understand the gap, manage it, build the necessary skill to a functional level, and bring other people into the business who have complementary strengths.
Your job isn't to become a perfect entrepreneur.
Your job is to create meaningful results.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Someone Else's Definition of Success
Comparison can quietly turn personal development into self-rejection.
You see another entrepreneur who communicates effortlessly.
Another leader who seems completely confident.
Another business owner who appears to have everything organized.
Another executive who seems naturally comfortable in front of an audience.
Then you compare their visible strengths with your private struggles.
That comparison can create the belief that you need to become someone else before you can succeed.
Jeni's message offers another perspective.
Identify your own gifts.
Understand your own values.
Clarify who you want to serve.
Determine the impact you want to create.
Then build from there.
Your path doesn't have to look like someone else's path to be successful.
Growth Should Help You Become More of Yourself
There is a difference between self-improvement and self-erasure.
Healthy growth doesn't require you to reject who you are.
It can mean becoming more aware of yourself, more capable of managing your weaknesses, more confident in your strengths, and more intentional about the impact you want to create.
That is especially relevant for leaders.
The objective isn't to become flawless.
It is to become effective.
It isn't to eliminate every weakness.
It is to understand which weaknesses need to be managed.
It isn't to copy someone else's leadership style.
It is to develop a leadership approach that fits your strengths, values, and purpose.
And it isn't to chase a title simply because it looks like progress.
It is to create meaningful impact.
You're Not Broken
Jeni Yelton's message is ultimately simple:
You're not broken.
You're not perfect either.
And you aren't supposed to be.
The goal of growth is not to spend your life on a hamster wheel trying to become an imaginary perfect version of yourself.
Learn.
Grow.
Develop.
Try new things.
Build new skills.
But do it because you want to grow and create greater impact—not because you believe you have to become someone else before you're worthy of success.
For entrepreneurs, leaders, and professionals, understanding your natural gifts can change how you approach your career, your business, and your relationships.
Your "flaws" may not disappear.
They don't have to.
The opportunity is to understand them, manage what gets in your way, develop what matters, and leverage the qualities that make you uniquely valuable.
That is where confidence can begin.
And for more conversations about personal development, communication, leadership, entrepreneurship, and the mindsets that help people build better businesses and lives, visit Glovisor and follow the Glovisor Podcast.
You don't have to fix yourself to become a better leader.
You may simply need to understand yourself better.